a new muse?

Since the beginning of the year I've noticed changes in what I'm choosing to write. I am still, generally, in the same area as before but there are some striking differences. First, I've written two erotica short stories this year and I can't tell you how long it's been - perhaps a decade, since the last time I had this urge. Second, my nonfiction writing is gearing up. Third, I've been getting the urge to write a S&S type story and last night I 'received' what looks like potentially a straight-up romance story. Uhmmm...Hello Muse - who ARE you and what did you do with my regular muse?

I'm not sure what to think about it. Perhaps I've simply waited long enough for new stories to arrive in these areas.

Generally, my muse gets all chatty at about the exact moment of my midterms - (this Thursday) and gets lazy at about the exact moment of my off time (next week)

I tend to think of this process as resistance. As a writer I'm often in personal conflict. I know that when I start it is like an addiction and I become rude to the world at large - I also know that the actual process is often exhausting. It didn't used to be this way. I used to feel more carefree, but, now, I bend into it and writing is like the furies of a storm. I want each stroke to 'make way' and to do so I must summon so much of me to the task.

I know that most people write crummy rough drafts but what comes out on my first run is often what most writers equate to a polished piece. This doesn't mean I don't need and do edits and revisions because I totally do - it's just that I've worked the frontal part of my creating process into a finer point over the years.

Most of my revisions are also scary - I'm getting used to putting a story in a drawer and starting over. Several writers 'watched' me do this one weekend and sorta freaked out. What I discovered, or the reason for doing such a complete new draft, is that by the time I reach the end of the story the first time, I actually know the story. If I start with knowing, it will develop organically in a different way. In a sense it is all about refining. And, it is all about risk taking.